5 Tips for Asymmetrical Neckline & Cold Shoulder Dresses
by Tina Boomerina (Christina Gregoire)
Shoulders are back for winter and beyond. If you’re wondering whether you can wear asymmetrical necklines and cold shoulder styles if you’re a woman over 50, well you can. (Just put your thumb over the faces of the twelve-year-old models and use your imagination.)
Here are 5 ideas about asymmetric, off-shoulder, cut-out and cold-shoulder necklines for boomer chicks and younger friends:
1. Bare Shoulders for Women Over 50, 60, 70:
As you well know, your boobies and your butt, as well as other things, start to sag or shift or wrinkle as you get older. Bummer. On the other hand, your shoulders are probably still in satisfactory condition. Cool.
So, bare those babies before they start to wrinkle like your décolletage. Well, in all honesty, I see nothing wrong with letting those chest-bound crinkles out in the open. As long as your outfit has the vibe of a sexy older woman (think Sophia Lauren), wear whatever neckline looks good on you.
On the other hand, bare shoulders are elegant at any age… even at YOUR AGE. You should show them off before they start sagging or doing something strange that I haven’t encountered on my own body yet.
All kidding aside, you can show your shoulders in almost any situation (except the Sistine Chapel or the Blue Mosque) without looking like an old slut.
2. Asymmetrical and Cold Shoulder Necklines Keep People’s Eyes off Your Butt:
Asymmetrical, off-shoulder, and cold-shoulder necklines force people to look at your upper body and your face. Now, I feel ya! You might not want people spending all day scrutinizing the wrinkles on your face and your neck, but eventually people will have to look at your face unless you’re wearing one of those full-on burqa things with the slits for eyes.
So, the best solution I have found is to make people’s eyes bounce around between your fat stomach, your lumpy hips, and your old-ish face. As long as your top or dress isn’t too tight in any of the wrong places, this will work… I promise. If you feel you need more coverage, wear some honking-big sunglasses.
*By the way, I'm perfectly fine with older birds wearing short-sleeved or sleeveless tops and dresses as night, even when the woman thinks her arms are too saggy or floppy for daytime. I'm sure there must be exceptions to this rule, but as long as everything else in the outfit is proportional, give it a try. We already know you're old, so WTF?
3. What Body Types Can Wear Asymmetrical Dresses?
I think you can find an offbeat neckline that works on your old bod no matter what type you have, but I can only vouch 100% for fat-tummied apple shapes with big shoulders because that’s what I am.
Apple Shapes: Anything that draws the eye from your tummy is good. One-shoulder necklines are fabulous.
Pear Shapes: Look for softer asymmetrical and shoulder-baring necklines. You can also wear big ruffles or soft drapes to add volume to your upper body.
Hourglass Shapes: Get outta here. You can wear anything.
Square or Rectangular Boy Shapes: Geometrical necklines are the most flattering on the celebs with boy shapes.
Broad Shoulders: Any neckline that swerves or swoops or zig-zags is good. Deep necklines cut up your broad chest. You can wear a straight, off-shoulder Bardot neckline, but it’s trickier. Try is look with wide pants and flatform shoes for height. (I have a lovely SpongeBob SquarePants body, so you can trust me on this.)
4. Asymmetrical Tops Save Money on Jewelry:
One of the cool things about asymmetrical and unusual necklines is you don’t need a necklace to light up your face and draw attention to your better aspects. You can just let the neckline do its thing. In fact, most necklaces won’t work at all with asymmetrical necklines. And, when you’re wearing a top with cutouts, cold-shoulder slits or off-shoulder Bardot sleeves, you’ll be gilding the lily if you add too many accessories. A clean look, with pearl studs or chandelier earrings is a much better option.
If you’re traveling and you don’t want to take a lot of jewelry, asymmetrical and off-shoulder tops are absolutely perfect with jeans for daytime or short skirts for dinner. An interesting neckline is all the polish you need… even in Europe.
5. Asymmetrical and Cut-Out Necklines Are Trendy:
I love unusual necklines because they are always feminine… even when it’s just a stretchy tee with a clean, geometric neckline or cool cutout shoulders.
Designers like Roland Mouret have been showing interesting necklines for the last few years, but you can find similar outfits with mainstream prices for this year’s holidays. And, you don’t have to worry that unique necklines are so hot they’ll burn out. I’ve seen lots of outfits with interesting necklines and bare shoulders for 2017.
I recommend checking out tops, dresses, and jumpsuits from Roland Mouret even if you don’t want to spend as much money as Kate Middleton or Melania Trump on your next outfit. Hey, I have fun looking at his designs even though his Ready-to-Wear probably doesn’t come in my size.
So, get some self-tanner. This trend is so hot you might end up with a coat sporting cut-out shoulders this year. I’m not kidding.
More Articles for Women Over 40 or 50:
Photo Credits: Prshots.com and other sites.
- Main Photo: Asos.com.
- Can Women Over 50, 60, 70 Wear Bare Shoulders: JD Williams.
- Asymmetrical One-Shoulder Party Dress: NewLook.com.
- Asymmetrical Cocktail Dresses: Debenhams.com.
- Roland Mouret, Ralph Lauren Asymmetrical Neckline Dresses: Kate Middleton in Roland Mouret, Ivanka Trump is possibly in Roland Mouret, Melania Trump in Ralph Lauren, Roland Mouret top worn by Ivanka Trump at fwrd.com. You can also see Roland Mouret at NeimanMarcus.com and Netaporter.com.
- Neckline Trends Spring Summer 2017