6 Internet Dating Tips for Older Women Looking for Men
by Tina Boomerina (Christina Gregoire)
Here are some tips to help you find good men online. I know that internet dating may be a new experience for you, so read this advice for finding love and avoiding creeps.
Almost every older, single woman wants to try internet dating. Well, there is no stigma associated with meeting men online, and that’s because internet dating is practical and realistic. Where else can men and women over 40, over 50, over 60, go to meet single, available people from every part of the country...heck...every part of the planet?
1. Don’t Fall in Love With a Photo:
While it is good to know that many women end up in second marriages with men from the internet, it is also good to keep your eyes open and not be love struck by:
- Beautiful photos of ugly men
- Guys who sound “so normal”
- Married men, of any kind
- Gigolos who house-sit and invite women over to "their" homes
Wait! There is hope for those who persevere. Good guys can actually be found. It just takes a while to find them. On the other hand, observe common-sense precautions. Only meet new men in public places where there are other people. (Somewhere like Starbucks.)
2. Don’t Expect Instant Happiness with Online Dating:
In the internet article, 10 Things Online Dating Services Won't Say (see Resources), author Jason Kephart gives this first tip:
- “Keep your hopes high and your expectations low.”
Websites like Match, E Harmony, Yahoo Personals, and others, average 20 million visitors a month. So, posting your photo online has gone totally mainstream. One Harris survey discovered that approximately 2% of marriages in the US are the result of an eHarmony connection. (Note: I met my husband on Match. I also like J Date if you don’t have a problem with other religions.)
3. Don't Fall in Love With a Fantasy
It’s not always easy to find romance. Even after email contact, you must meet your potential date in person to see if there’s chemistry (for both of you). And, this is something that can’t be determined over the phone. There are so many attributes you need to experience in person, and compatibility can’t be found with a computer search.
4. "Everyone’s Lying About Something"
This tip is from Kephart's article, "Everyone’s Lying About Something.” The internet-dating article continues, “Some online suitors stretch the truth to get a date.” Really?
After a while, you’ll learn to expect this. Then, you’ll be pleasantly surprised when real-life men resemble their online photos and their bio descriptions.
Hey, it’s just too easy to fudge the numbers when no one’s looking (like when filling out a dating profile), however it’s not always with evil intent. For example, many women who are 42 say that they are 39, in order for their photos to show up in online searches.
And, dating site bios are a perfect place for people to “describe their ideal selves”, rather than a place for people to give revealing, soul-searching, objective appraisals of who they really are... it's not a therapy session.
5. Don’t Be Naive When Dating Online:
Number 5 on the list, is about money. Kephart is searingly accurate with this one:
- “Fall in Love Too Quickly and You Could End Up Broke.”
Daters should be on the lookout for scams. And, if someone seems too good to be true, he probably is. One of the Boomerinas on this site has written a book about a man she met online who WAS too good to be true... and she ended up losing her house.
Beware any man who says he is local (in his bio) and is actually somewhere else, like Eastern Europe. Some men, from other countries, are looking for free tickets to American citizenship through the institution of marriage. However, if a man seems up front about his situation, he may be legit. But, don't send anyone money - for anything.
6. Internet Dating and Happy Endings:
Do not give up hope. After deciding to get out into the world again, internet dating can be a great experience for you. However, don’t expect instant happiness. It can take years to find the right person. (I met my current husband online after several years of duds.)
However, remember that people lie. They could be telling “little white lies” or they could be feeding you wallet-stomping whoppers. But, don’t give up hope for your own happy ending. It’s out there somewhere... as soon as you meet that one good man.
More Articles for Baby Boomer Women:
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